Gift that keeps on giving

You're no fool

I recently received a regifted gift.  It's not the first time this has happened to me. I think it's incredibly rude, but not worth ruining a "friendship" over.  Has anyone handled being the recipient of a regifted gift with civility and good humor but also with the clear message that you know the gift is not an original? -- Leigh, Syracuse

NuKazoo readers share their experiences:

The issue here is not regifting, it's deception.  If you're going to use someone's occasion to offload an item you don't want, at least have the decency to tell them.  When I'm the recipient of something that obviously came from the closet of unwanted gifts, I make no bones of calling it out, however humorously.  I once received a tea set that had no sign of recent origin.  I don't even drink tea!  The giver opened the door when she asked me if I liked it.  Let the regifter beware!

-- Monica, Rochester, NY

I'm sure that I've received regifted gifts, but I haven't said anything.  Shouldn't all gifts be graciously received?  A gift is not an entitlement.  Why worry about the origins of the gift?

-- Susan, SW suburbs of Chicago

Why be so picky?  I have given re-gifted items and I've received them.  As a recipient, I don't care as long as the gift is something I like.  As a giver, though, it wouldn't have occurred to me that some people would know, would care, or would care to know.  Perhaps I should think about this next time I go to "change the wrapping" on a gift and give it to someone else.  I never meant to offend!  Thanks for the heads up.

-- Lexi, Pittsburgh

I read in some newspaper that regifted items are acceptable in certain circumstances -- if the gift wasn't from the person you're giving it to, if the item isn't used or dirty, if it's not one-of-a-kind or made specifically for you, etc.  I'm thinking, hooey!  Regifted items are cheap and more about you than the person you're "gifting."  I wouldn't accept 'em, so I wouldn't give 'em.  The only one exception I can think of is -- cash.  I hope my friends and relatives read this and mentally file it away.  I'd rather receive no gift than a regifted gift.  And believe me, I'd know!

-- Missy from Roanoke

Oh, I couldn't wait to respond to this one.  My husband and I received a strange looking lemonade pitcher (who gives that?) as a wedding gift.  It wasn't even in a box, but rather in one of those gift bags.  A glass pitcher in a gift bag! No stickers, no tags on the thing.  It was not only regifted, but used!  I told the giver we had received so many other pitchers that if she didn't mind we'd return it and where did she get it.  The giver hemmed and hawed and gave some answer that didn't make sense, something like she got it in her travels out west and didn't have the receipt.  I said nothing in response.  The pitcher went in the garbage the same day.  She never got a written thank you from us.

-- Vicky, Stevensville, MI

I once received a very generic platter for a birthday gift from a girlfriend.  What was odd was that it was so impersonal for this friend to give me and not something that showed any knowledge of me or my taste.  As I opened it, a gift card dropped out.  It was dated the prior Christmas and made out to her from her sister-in-law.  I was so taken aback I didn't know what to say.  I handed her the card and we both started laughing.  We agreed not to exchange gifts anymore, which is probably a good thing.

-- Stacey from OK

I received a bunch of used (does that count as regifted?) Christmas tree ornaments from my mother-in-law one year.  She actually wrapped them and gave them to us as our Christmas present!  She admitted they were ornaments from her collection of the past few decades.  How do you respond to that?  I told her I was giving them to her daughter, that I couldn't possibly take them from her.

-- Amy from Rockford, IL

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